Sarah Selina Macmillean reflects on a deeply moving guest lecturing experience at Leeds Beckett University, and how it encouraged her to share some personal experiences with the students.
Sarah Selina Macmillean, Occupational Therapist, MSc, BA (Hons)
In January 2023, I was invited by Leeds Beckett University to guest lecture to the BSc occupational therapy first year students with two guest lecturers, Steven Delsol and Stephen Antoine, on mental illness and the black community and promoting occupational justice: using music, song writing and poetry as meaningful occupations. Steven Delsol is a retired occupational therapy lecturer and street poet. He had led the classroom activities on writing as a therapeutic medium, from a biographical perspective of how it can help to overcome psychological flashpoints and triggers, as well as writing as occupational activism.
The students were designated the task to write a piece of poetry to share their lived experiences of trauma and how they may have overcome traumatic experiences and triggers throughout their lives. This was a thought provoking and reflective task that had left me feeling emotional and empathetic for the students who had shared their powerful poetry pieces. It had evoked traumatic memories based on my lived experiences with trauma and mental health.
Stephen Antoine and I were then introduced to the class by the module leader. Stephen shared with the students his reflection of his life story on addiction, mental health, institutionalization, and depression. Stephen’s portrayal of his life was authentic, honest, and raw. I felt inspired by his transparency to share his experiences of mental illness which can be stigmatized. Over the years I have witnessed people being discriminated against because of their mental health conditions, which has made me feel ashamed to reveal that part of my experiences. However, Stephen had evoked a fire in me and a sense of confidence that had encouraged me to reveal my truth once it was my time to present to the class.
My initial concept was to present my experience of being a musician and the therapeutic qualities that music has had on my healing from trauma and loss throughout my life, to discuss how occupational therapy plays a vital role in promoting health through the participation of meaningful occupations, and the role of music as an occupation in self-care (healing through singing, writing, and listening to music), productivity (song writing and production), and leisure (paid/ voluntary gigs and music workshops).
Feeling inspired by Stephen’s authenticity, I had made some changes to my presentation to incorporate photographs of my parents to provide a biographical review of my childhood, being raised in the foster care system and my parents struggle with mental health and addiction. Although my parents had mental health challenges, they were more than just an illness. My father was a musician and my mum studied law. Both creative and intelligent people, who unfortunately had an illness, which did not define them. I shared the impact of my mum’s sudden death in April 2021, during which time I was studying my master's degree. When she was alive, she would pray with me, encourage me and was proud of my achievements. Although it was difficult for me to continue studying while grieving, I persevered. I felt motivated to qualify, not only for myself, but for my mother too. I discussed how I overcame the odds, beat the statistics of children raised in care and their outcomes, gained a master’s degree, and became a qualified occupational therapist; and how music, singing, song writing, and performance has been the consistent thread throughout my life.
Music has influenced my life positively. It has enabled me to develop meaningful relationships that have often-times replaced the loss of biological family, encouraging me to engage in the world productively, and be a role model for those who may be experiencing similar traumas, not only through occupational therapy, but through my lived experiences. Once I had shared my story, I continued to lecture to the students, exploring the concept of music as a meaningful occupation, the lack of research to evidence this, and the importance of innovation within occupational therapy in developing new areas for research.
Although it was an emotional presentation, I was supported by the module leader and the class, who had applauded my bravery in sharing my story. Lecturing was a freeing experience that went beyond my expectations. I loved the authenticity of the students and the guest lecturers, and I reflected to the class that I had learned that day the importance of transparency, and the impact it can have on others, when you feel safe to share difficult experiences.
To conclude, given the opportunity to guest lecture again, I will take on the values of honesty, transparency, and bravery, while combining my academic, work, and lived experiences to teach the students. As a former student, I felt connected to the lecturers who gave more of themselves; not only academically but personally, when it was appropriate to do so. I was able to connect with the lectures who held a space for open dialogue which created an impactful learning environment, which I believe had contributed to my academic progress. Lecturing is something that I had never believed I would feel confident to pursue, however, this experience has made me eager for more. I would like to continue to specialise in mental health, develop research, and create music therapy groups for service users, including young people in care and care leavers, through occupational therapy, and promoting music as a meaningful occupation.
There are many stigmas attached to mental health. My aim is to provide occupational therapy and demonstrate to individuals that they can live a meaningful life and achieve success, despite their upbringing and health challenges.